Santorum looks up to the sky the Cheese God, holding an icon of the religion (actual photo from the New York Times).

In a last ditch attempt to sway a few more voters, Rick Santorum denounced his Christian religion and turned his faith over to the cheese.

Mr. Santorum, whose been doing his best Bruce Willis in The Sixth Sense impersonation this week (he’s dead, but doesn’t know it), is now losing by most news organization’s estimates “by, like,  a bajillion delegates” to Mormon Mitt Romney.

” Rick is feeling the pressure. He knows he’s behind. So he’s going for the old ‘if you can’t beat them, join them’ strategy’. Now, like Romney, he’s a flip-flopper and has a crazy religion,” a Santorum campain aid told us under the condition of anonymity(not because she wasn’t allowed to talk to us, but because she didn’t want to be associated with Santorum).

Rick Santorum’s change of religion has already had some effect in recent polls. In a poll before the switch 78% of voters didn’t realize he was still running, where in a most recent poll that has changed to 78% of voters wondering why he was still in the race. Newt Ginrich continues to poll at 2%.

Meanwhile, Mr. Romney has entered full presidential campaign mode, making gaffes a record pace. Last night he told a crowd he knows how hard the economy has been on them because of the pain he felt when he had to fire his 8th butler. Then, at a stop at a local diner, he became confused by a dollar bill because he didn’t realize money denominations came that small. Many bloggers also accused him of being out of touch when it was announced he would miss a few campaign stops due to an injury he succomed to while trying to dive into his money bin like his hero Scrooge McDuck.

 

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.