300.cage.nicholas.lc.090909Nicolas Cage plays a treasure hunter in the movie National Treasure, in real life Mr. Cage didn’t hunt, but rather just bought his treasure. Mr. Cage’s poor spending habits is the reason why he’s so many movies now. He bought so much crap he put himself in a debt that MC Hammer could admire.

Here’s a just few of the rings Mr. Cage wasted his money on:

Dinosaur Skull



Mr. Cage spent close to a million dollars outbidding Leonardo DiCaprio for a dinosaur skull. Most of us have to go to a museum to see a prehistoric skull, but not ol’ Nick. All he has to do is walk into his pantry (which is where I assumer he keeps it, next to the Double Stuff Oreos). ¬†For those of us who can’t get movie roles where we get our heads put in a basket of bees, we have to pay the suggested donation of $19. At that price Mr. Cage would only have to look at that skull 21,000 times for it to start to pay for itself.



Mr. Cage has an obsession with Superman. He was even signed up to play Supes in a movie that we can thank God was never made. He owned tons of valuable comics, including Action Comics #1 (the first appearance of Superman). Unfortunately, Mr. Cage wound up having to sell all his comics for 1.5 million dollars. Poor guy just can’t get a break.

A Car


Mr. Cage owns lots of cars. No big deal, so does Jay Leno and lots of celebrities. That’s not too weird. But if you want an example of Mr. Cage’s poor spending habits, this is a perfect example. He bought a¬†Lamborghini Miura SVJ for close to a half a million dollars even though it was only worth about half that. It used to belong to the Shah of Iran if that makes you feel better.



Yeah, Nic Cage owns a castle. Here I am excited to get a coupon for four free sliders from White Castle and this guy owns a castle. He doesn’t live there or anything (he owns about five mansions that are probably a little less drafty), he just has it.

Shruken Heads


Who knows how much Mr. Cage spent on his shrunken heads. In theory he shouldn’t own them, because it’s illegal to import them. So either Mr. Cage had them imported illegally or he had some hobos killed and got their heads shrunk. Either way, it’s probably expensive.


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