The Jokes:

Two men in Texas have been jailed for stealing 68 cents. The biggest shame is that they don’t even have enough money from both of them to mail out an appeal.

Apple cut orders of glass for their iPhone leading investors to think it must not be selling too well. I think it must mean something else, the iPhone 6 will be made of diamonds.

Dan Brown’s next book is inspired by Dante’s Inferno. Odd, based on my reaction to reading his books I thought they were all about going through Hell.

The Fork With A Speedometer:


Ever wonder how fast you eat? No, of course not. But in case you change your mind may I introduce you to the Hapifork. This fork keeps track of how fast you eat and uploads it to the internet. Of course there’s also an app for that.

The HAPIfork … vibrates when you eat too fast.
This is the least dumb you can look while using this fork.

Why would you want to know something so stupid? Because the faster you, the more you’ll gain, maybe. The Hapifork keep track of how many mouthfuls of food you eat in a minute. If you go to fast the thing will light up and begin to vibrate. I assume the thought is you’ll be to embarrassed to stick something that vibrates in your mouth and will just stop eating, causing you to lose weight.


Watch This:

An invisible driver visits a drive-thru.

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