Soon To Be Defunct

Jun 18, 2013

There are somethings that’ll be around forever, like cockroaches and The Simpsons. But other things like Blockbuster Video and Snooki are not meant to last forever.

Here are a few things I predict will be gone within the next 10 years:

Used Games: Microsoft's biggest enemy... after Red Rings, Blue Screens, The Zune, Linux and incompetence.
Used Games: Microsoft’s biggest enemy… after Red Rings, Blue Screens, The Zune, Linux and incompetence.

Gamestop:

If you are planning on buying a video game, right now Gamestop is probably the first place that comes to mind. They’ve outlasted (read bought out) competitors such as Funco Land, EB Games, and Babbages. For that reason you probably think they are bullet proof. But it is not meant to be.

Right now Gamestop’s biggest revenue comes from selling used games. But starting with Microsoft’s ill named XBox One, buying used games is going to become harder. But the real threat to Gamestop is the rise of digital downloads. All three major players in the video game business are trying hard to convince their users to buy their games over the internet and skip the stores.

Digitally downloading the game directly from Nintendo, Microsoft or Sony adds connivence to the customer who don’t need a disc or to drive to the store and gives more money to the company because they don’t have to share profits with Gamestop, pay to have it shipped to the store or even manufacture cases.

Home Telephone:

Remember the days of waiting for your brother to get off the phone so you could call your BFF (who you haven’t seen since high school, making that second F a total lie), and then once you were on the phone your Mom bugging you to get off because she was waiting for a call from the doctor? Not to mention the complete lack of privacy if the only phone was installed in the living room.

But now we all have cell phones. We can make phone calls anywhere we want and we pay $70+ a month for the privilege. So why do home phones still exist? Because cable companies bundle it with the internet and TV services. That and old people that aren’t hip enough to realize how unhip they are. Sooner or later the unhip will die off and the rest of us will figure out it’s pointless to have something we don’t need, no matter how much we’re “saving” by getting it as part of Cablevision’s Triple Play.

"Mom, can we rent Deep Throat?" "Not until you're 11, honey."
“Mom, can we rent Deep Throat?”
“Not until you’re 11, honey.”

Red Box:

It won’t be long until we start seeing memes with a picture of a Red Box, along with a caption that says “If you got your movies from here, you are a ’10s Kid.”

While Red Box, with it’s cheap dollar rentals may seem pretty cool, it’s still using physical media, a dying format. Even Red Box knows this, which is why they’ve started their own streaming service to compete with Netflix and Amazon.

DVDs:

There’s a trend here. Physical media is dying. While it may not be completely dead in the next 10 years, DVDs sure will be. As people upgrade to their HDTVs, and then upgrade again to 4k TVs, DVDs will keep looking crappier and crappier compared to other formats.

How long until we start storing the DVDs in the basement next to the VHS tapes and Laser Discs?

The Howsers.
The Howsers.

Gay Marriage Bans:

Maybe I’m being overly optimistic here, but so much progress has been made in the acceptance of homosexuality over the last ten years it doesn’t seem like much of a stretch to me.

I predict that we’re not to far off from Gay Marriage being legal in all fifty states, most likely due to a Supreme Court ruling. However, I wouldn’t rule out congress actually just passing a law. The people against such a measure will be viewed the same as those who were for segregation,.

 

 

 

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