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Fake News


George Bush announced yesterday that he gave The War on Iraq three thumbs up on TiVo, showing how much he loves the war.

"Now that TiVo knows how good this war is, hopefully it will begin suggesting new countries to invade," Bush told reporters by speaker phone while he sat in his pajamas eating a bowl of Captain Crunch, "I also gave Family Matters three thumbs up cause that Urkel kid cracks me up."

So far, however, TiVo has only suggested a rerun of Perfect Strangers and American Pie 2.

"It's not what I was looking for, but that Balki guy cracks me up too. American Pie 2 has boobies in it, so it can't be that bad," Bush told us later from Noise Land Video Arcade where he had just finished up a game of Street Fighter.

Bush also announced he cancelled his season pass to Newsline because he was afraid it would cause Pokemon to be deleted from the Hard Drive.

Three thumbs up is more than a man can do, cause he only has two thumbs.