Bush Accidentally Visits Iraq for Thanksgiving
The nation was stunned upon learning the news that supposed Bush visited Iraq
on Thanksgiving. But Bush admitted yesterday to friends that he was actually
trying to travel to Turkey, in search of a thanksgiving dinner, and arrived on
accident Iraq due to using “an old map.”.
These friends, who I suppose aren’t very good friends since they leaked this
information, also told us that Bush was very scared when he learned he had
arrived in Iraq because that was where the “boogeyman” his dad had told him
about when he was a kid (or at least 35 years old) lived. Bush gathered up his
courage by putting on his army jumpsuit and pretending he was one of those
brave men he had seen on Hogan’s Heroes.
Bush was initially disappointed thinking he would only be able to eat beef
jerkey, microwave burritos, and slurpees because “that’s all those Hindu people
sell”. Bush was finally able to settle in once he found out there was some
turkey, although he was somewhat disappointed there wasn’t any of those cool 7
-Eleven Big Bite Bacon Cheeseburger logs available.
Our sources told us Bush left happy with his souvenir “I Visited Iraq and All
I Got Was This Stupid T-Shirt” T-Shirt and, proving the proclamation on the
shirt was false, a Iraqi snow globe. Bush spent most of his time on the trip
back home working on his letter to Santa Clause and playing Battlefield 1942
while wishing a loud that “this war was as cool as the one in my video game.”
In case you’re wondering why this story has just been posted almost a month
after this would of been actually topical… bite me.
The turkey with a fake turkey