The transit strike has arrived in New York City and millions of news journalists are effected by having to cover the story for hours on end. These poor news journalists have to stand out on this somewhat cold day on the streets and interview disgruntled New Yorkers.

But, worry no more, solutions are on their way. Mayor Bloomberg has rose into action with sure fire ways to deal with the problem. You’ve no doubt already heard that Taxi cabs will now be able to accept more than one fare at a time and that car pooling is being encouraged by, er, asking people if they wouldn’t mind sharing a car ride.

But what other steps are taking to deal with tragedy? Well, glad you asked. Here are three:

1)Monkey Bars have been installed in busy pedestrian sections. Imagine your walking down 7th street on your way to Penn Station when, damn it, some slow old lady is taking her time with her walker in front of you. What do you do? Push her over? No, not this time. Now you can just jump up, grab the monkey bars, and swing your way over her.

2)Piggy Back Rides. Mayor Bloomberg is personally giving anyone who wants one, a ride back to their home from the city. On the right we see Ol’ Mikey trying to get a woman to Lincoln Square, but he appears to be lost, don’t worry Bloomy, you’ll get there!

3)Stay Home. Who wants you here anyway.