You don't understand; I could of had class; I could of been a contender; I could of been somebody; instead of a bum, which is what I am. Let's face it.

In a sudden outburst:

Holy sh*t! I just figured it out! This war was all about the oil!

Showing aggression towards officials questioning him:

You see what I'm doing? I'm pretending my fingers are guns and I'm shooting you! Scared?

Again on prison torture:

I offered to be led around naked on a leash. That would of been nice. That Lynndie England chick is hot.

I will confess to these crimes.... if you can snatch this pen from my hand.